Short One Liner Jokes

I had amnesia once – maybe twice.

Death to all fanatics!

I just got lost in thought, and it was unfamiliar territory.

Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

Time is a great healer, but a terrible beautician.

A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.

Plan to be spontaneous – tomorrow.

Confession is good for the soul, but bad for your career.

A closed mouth gathers no foot.

A day without sunshine is like night.

My wild oats have turned to shredded wheat!

I’d kill for a Nobel Peace prize.

A day for firm decisions! Or is it?

Clones are people two.

Friction can be a drag sometimes.

Geez if you believe in honkus.

Drilling for oil is boring.

Honk if you love peace and quiet.

I got arrested in LA and boy am I beat!

We are all prawns in the game of life.

When in doubt, mumble.